Today I Learned…

There is nothing wrong with being petty

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We Still Having Trouble With Hygiene in 2016?

How is it 2016 and we still have people smelling like the essence of ass:patrice:? I just don’t understand:mindblown:. Take damn shower and USE A DAMN WASH CLOTH:damn: (If you’re classy like me use a loofer). Whhhhhhhhhhhhhyyyyy are people still washing with a bar soap? Sticking a whole bar of soap between the crack of your ass and through lips of the vagina:dahell:. Not washing behind the ears. Disgusting:scusthov:. And pleeeeease do not try to mask your funk with perfume/body spray/cologne. All you doing is making matters worst:martin:. Just take a damn shower. In process of taking a shower, learn how to clean your body properly:ld:. For my fat family, wash under every fold and every breast. We choose not to have a  smooth body, so we need to clean them crevasses:francis:.

This rant is brought to you by some stank guy who stood in line in front of me:leostare:. His smell was so bad I wanted to vomit:scust:. I told him he smelled like convention ass. Not verbally but through my facial expression:rudy:.

 

I can’t do funk:to:.  So please take a shower and wash your ass:beli:.

 

I’m a Creep…

You ever look at a granny and be like “DAAAMMMMMMMMMMMN!!!!!!!!!! I’ll drink your bath water”:whoo:. These grannies (milfs too) be sooo looking delicious. Be making me question my morals. Like I shouldn’t be having these sexual thoughts somebody grandmother:damn:.  Meryl Streep, Chaka Khan and Helen Mirren are just  :whew:.  I’d stiff arm Jesus for a chance to rub bengay on their joints :manny::shaq:.

Happy Songs

  1. Murals – Lupe Fiasco
    My favorite song of all time. Nuff said.
  2. Play No Games – Big Sean ft. Chris Brown, Ty Dolla $ign
    Song smooth ass hell.
  3. Middle – DJ Snake ft. Bipolar Sunshine
    Every time I hear this song I think of the video with Lexy Panterra, which I love for obvious reason.
  4. Lights – Boyce Avenue Cover
    Love This Cover. Millions times better than original version.
  5. We Good – Fabolous ft. Rich Homie Quan
    All the good times come rushing to my head every time this song is played.
  6. Here – Alessia Cara
    Speak to my introvert nature. I value two things in life: my loneliness and my friends/family.
  7. Nakamarra -Hiatus Kaiyote
    Favorite new band.
  8. Street – Jamie Woon
    He is a fucking BEAST.
  9. Glory to the Lord – King Los ft. R.Kelly
    My Jesus Walks.
  10. Vampires – Lazyboy Empire
    LOOOOOVE THIS SONG!
  11. Call It Off – Shamir
    If this song don’t make you sing and dance we will NEVER be friends. NEVER.
  12. Do It – Tuxedo
    Just dance and be happy.
  13. Lay Down – Son Little
    Second only to Jamie Woon. Son Little is a beast.
  14. Playing Favorites – Skyzoo
    Why am I just hearing about him? Quickly becoming my favorite rap artist.
  15. Greek Tragedy (Oliver Nelson Remix) – The Wombats
    *Austin Powers Voice* Grooovey Baby!
  16. Alright – Kendrick Lamar
    When ever I am down I just throw on this song and smile.
  17. Gun & Rose –  Baccano Opening Theme
    Dem Horns and Trumpets!!!
  18. Tears Dry On Their Own – Amy Winehouse
    Died too soon…my favorite female jazz singer.

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